A Sad Clown

Since when did I become a talker?
and... I do make a lot of jokes, huh...

Maybe, subconsciously, I believe that it makes people like me.
and i must like it...
why should i?
it's not how i want myself to be.
actually, why should i care so much?
wasn't i always been self-sustaining?

Everything was bothersome but myself... right?
A lot of experiences say that I am no good with others...
but then again, few...

I think I have enough those "few"...
so, no need to look further...

Have to be myself ASAP.