As an Observer

I've always been an outsider;
I've always been an observer
--- of the humanity.
(That's very extreme, but sometimes that's how I feel.)
I've always had hard time fitting in - although I have friends here and there with numerous acquaintances.
(I think I have so many acquaintances because I remember them with my superb memory and they remember me due to my unique background.)

Also, I am one of the best in picking up patterns: be it something graphical, mathematical, tabular or behavioral.
I am also great at picking up signs.

As an observer,
I would not know reasons for it.
The reasons for whatever I noticed are something only an insider would know.
But I am just an observer. I know when I see a pattern or a sign and what it implies.

The unknown reasons are conundrums that I would ponder often for days,
but I know sometimes it's best just to let it go.

I am done forcing anything in the universe.
I just want to go with the flow - although I am still learning how to do it right.

First time listening to hip hop in months.
I was deeply immersed in J-Pop for months.
Once in a while, it's nice to go back to my old taste.
But tomorrow at work, I will probably go back to Misia.