I have been planning for my life all the time.
I have been planning for my life, and I have set a distinct schedule of what things are going to happen until the end of 2012.
But guess what.
In my flight to Houston today,
I realized that I don't have a dream.
One of my dreams was lost with letters of rejections in 2007.
Another dream was shattered lately.
I don't know what's the good of having something planned for next 3 years when there is no dream.
I still want to be a full-time researcher/lecturer economist.
I also want to be somebody specialized in financial risks.
I know the beautiful taste of mathematics, microeconomics, macroeconomics, and now business valuation.
But I don't want to pursue mathematics no more.
I love it, but I don't feel the thirst for it.
My thirst is on economics and finance, now.
But I don't know where to take it.
I told myself that after 3 years, I will decide.
I told my friends that.
But taking steps without any long term goal is just plain senseless to me.
I am the one who likes to stick to the plan, who has to have a clear path.
But I don't have one for myself now.
My dreams were shattered, but here I stand.
Plans mean shit to me. I have to have a dream.
And that has to be a realizable dream.
At my age, I can't chase after ghosts.
I can't chase after ghosts of things I can't achieve, people I can't have around.
I have been planning for my life, and I have set a distinct schedule of what things are going to happen until the end of 2012.
But guess what.
In my flight to Houston today,
I realized that I don't have a dream.
One of my dreams was lost with letters of rejections in 2007.
Another dream was shattered lately.
I don't know what's the good of having something planned for next 3 years when there is no dream.
I still want to be a full-time researcher/lecturer economist.
I also want to be somebody specialized in financial risks.
I know the beautiful taste of mathematics, microeconomics, macroeconomics, and now business valuation.
But I don't want to pursue mathematics no more.
I love it, but I don't feel the thirst for it.
My thirst is on economics and finance, now.
But I don't know where to take it.
I told myself that after 3 years, I will decide.
I told my friends that.
But taking steps without any long term goal is just plain senseless to me.
I am the one who likes to stick to the plan, who has to have a clear path.
But I don't have one for myself now.
My dreams were shattered, but here I stand.
Plans mean shit to me. I have to have a dream.
And that has to be a realizable dream.
At my age, I can't chase after ghosts.
I can't chase after ghosts of things I can't achieve, people I can't have around.
